The Oldest and Dearest...

The Oldest and Dearest...

For obvious reasons, I don't normally use the term 'old friends' when referring to friends of long-standing! However, I think this time it is perfectly appropriate because I've been friends with this man for over half a century - in fact, for 55 years!

I first met Alan (Hicks) during the first year of high school. There were, in fact, 5 boys named Alan in our class. We're never sure, but I think he was Alan number 2 and I was Alan number 4. Memories may be a little cloudy here, except we're both certain that neither of us was Alan number 1!! 

                                The Secondary School (High School) where Alan and I were in the same class for 3 years

Entrance to the School 

Alan left school a year or so before I did to pursue his career and became very successful in the shipping world, eventually ending up owning and running his own business before retiring.

Not long after I started working, we met up again and the friendship really took off. We would meet after work, at least once a week,  and he would drive me (and a couple of other friends) to one of the many pubs where we would catch up with what had been happening in the meantime.

Together with a mutual friend, we had our first holiday 'abroad' in Torremolinos, Spain. We certainly built some memories at that time!

I remember playing the organ at his wedding - 'Bridge Over Troubled Water' and 'Ave Maria (Bach-Gounod version) if my memory serves me correctly. I had the good fortune of helping him to move up to Huntingdonshire - and we were recently reminiscing about how we managed to pack everything into one rented cube van. (I think I learned a lot about efficient packing from him!)

I watched Alan become successful in his work and how he built a loving family, with two boys who excelled in tennis and badminton but, more to the point, were both a credit to their parents in the way the carried themselves.

After I moved to Southampton, back in the mid-1970's, we drifted apart a little for a few years, though still kept in touch through birthdays and Christmas cards etc., and an occasional visit.

Years later, after I had moved to Canada and met Mark, I heard that Alan and his first wife had recently separated and I got in touch with him. He came to visit us when we were living in Etobicoke, and it was great to spend time with him and reconnect at a deeper level than before.

Elaine enjoying a refreshing drink with Alan

We visited each other a number of times, on either side of the pond, and it was after he had come over to help me celebrate my 50th birthday that we had a message from him to say that he had met Elaine - the 'future Mrs. Hicks'. It was wonderful to be present at their wedding and to see them both so happy. 

When the law changed, allowing us to get married, Alan and Elaine came over for the week beforehand and Alan stood up for me as one of my witnesses (together with Pat and Marco). We had many laughs that week and we became closer than ever.

Since that time and, with the advance in technology, we have kept in touch via Skype so that we could see each other as well as hear each other. Conversation never runs dry and his sense of humour remains as sharp as ever!!

And so, it was only natural that, when we arrived in the U.K. a couple of weeks ago, it was to Shoebury, Essex, that we first stopped and we had a wonderful few days with him and Elaine on either side of our visit to Paris.

Alan can be just as zany as me!

Alan is one of those people who is the epitome of loyalty and true friendship which has stood the test of time. He has always been there for me and I could always rely on him to pick me up when I needed it. He was there during my early struggles in coming to terms with being a gay man, and - although he didn't fully understand (who of us ever did, in those days?) - he was always supportive of me - and for that, I will always be grateful.

Alan is one of the most positive people that I know and this has been a constant trait of his since I first met him. Even with recent health challenges, his positivity is something to admire and emulate. It means a great deal me to have someone in my life who can remember my teenage years, with all of its ups and downs; who can relate to names and places that make up the tapestry of life in those early days; who knew and loved my mom and dad, and other family members, and can remember some of the funniest and zaniest of stories and join in a little nostalgia now and then.

During my life, I have been blessed with numerous friends who have had a tremendous influence in my life. Mark and I continue to meet new people who enrich our lives and we consider ourselves fortunate to have many friends that are still in our circle.

That being said, Alan is truly my oldest and dearest friend - someone who links my past and present, and whose constancy and loyalty continues to shine among all the changes in my life's journey.

He has my love, my respect, and my gratitude and I am proud to know him.

Lasting Friendships!

Lasting Friendships!

Every now and then, we get a glimpse of how we are really and truly blessed by the people who have come into our lives. Yesterday was one of those moments.

Mark, Paul, Alan, Rosie

As parents of children whom I had the privilege of teaching in my early days, Rosemary and Paul were very supportive. I became close friends with the family and will be forever grateful for the many wonderful times I spent in their company. 

After having lunch with Rosemary and Paul, we spent a couple of hours in a coffee shop in Southampton and were reunited with some long-standing and special friends.

It was awesome that these wonderful people made the effort and took the time to be with us.

I have known Theresa since my first days in Hampshire. She always made me feel welcome at the church I used to attend when I first moved to Calmore, near Totton. She hasn't changed one bit, and it was a delight to see her.

Sarah, Alan, Theresa

Sarah will always hold a special place in my heart. Her mom, dad, and family embraced me in those early days and I was always welcome in their home. I had the honour of teaching piano to all three children - Sarah, Chris, and Rachel, (their younger brother, Luke, was fortunate enough to escape that experience!!). We had many laughs in those days and I'll never forget the time I spent with Sarah in the Loire Valley when I went to stay with her while she was working as an au pair with a lovely family there.

Alan and Michele

Michele - what can I say about him? He is one beautiful soul and I am so darn proud of the awesome man he has become. He was in my very first class when I started teaching. You couldn't help but love him and the sparkle in his eyes endeared him to you - even when he was getting into scrapes!!! I can't tell you how it made me feel that he wanted to come and meet us, and it was an honour to get to meet Mona and his two wonderful children.

Michele, Alan, and Mark

Carol and I were neighbours when I moved into the first home I bought in Redbridge, just a mile away from Totton. I will never forget her generosity and kindness over the years. I didn’t learn to drive until I came to live in Canada, so Carol would regularly give me a ride to the supermarket every Saturday. She was also kind enough to laugh at all my jokes – even when she’d heard them before. We spent many hours together in those days, and it was fabulous to see her yesterday.

Alan, Carol, Mark

Alan, Michele, and Tony

Tony was the first headmaster (principal) with whom I had the privilege to serve in the teaching profession. It was Tony that encouraged me to choose that profession over another about which I had been thinking of taking up. He was always supportive of me in my green days, and I learned so much from him. I will always be grateful for his guidance and his unfailing example of dedication and commitment, which stood me in good stead throughout my career. Tony and his wonderful wife, Jill (who, unfortunately passed away just over a year ago) invited me into their home every week when I went to teach piano to their daughter, Catherine – though I’m not sure how much learning was achieved amongst the laughter we always generated in those half-hour sessions! I will always be grateful to their son, Tim, through whom I was able to reconnect with Tony just last year. Tim is an exceptional musician and is well known as a performer and masterclass instructor in the U.K.

Sarah, Alan, Michele, Tony, Theresa

Top Row: Alan, Mark, Tony, and Theresa
Bottom Row: Sarah and Michele

Pauline is a soul mate whom I met when I was serving as a nurse for mentally challenged people in a local hospital. Our friendship was solidified many years ago and has remained constant ever since. She has an innate wisdom and was a true friend who always told me what I needed to hear – not just what I wanted to hear. She has a huge heart and has always been so loving and full of kindness. This has been inherited by her amazing sons – Jim and Paul. These two young men were a very important part of my life while I lived in Totton, and their friendship will always be a very special treasure for which I will always have appreciation. It has been an honour to have had some time with them during this visit. We finally got to meet the gorgeous Lisa, (Paul’s other half) and their two delightful children. We haven’t met Jim’s other half yet, but we’re hoping to do so before we move on to our next venue.

Alan and 'Our Jim'

Top Row: Mark, Alan, Derek (with Alannah on his shoulder), and Paul
Bottom Row: Will and Lisa

Alan, Pauline, and Mark

Alannah, Alan, and William, with Jim presiding!

Alan, Mark, Jim, and Paul - with Alannah and Will in the background

Alan, Will, Mark, and Alannah

We continually meet the most amazing people wherever we go and we certainly hold our newer friends very dear to our hearts. This trip has reminded us of those who have been in our lives for a very long time and we feel honoured and blessed that they wanted to spend a few hours with us.

The Boulangerie Victor Hugo, in Southampton - where we met all these fine folks

There were many other friends we would like to have seen but we didn’t get the chance to do so. Hopefully, we will get to meet them on future trips. Thanks to social media, we are able to keep in touch, regardless of the distance between us.

I'll let my childhood pop idols, Cliff Richard and Cilla Black, have the final word about friendship...

A Paris Walkabout!

A Paris Walkabout!

Just a couple of days ago, we arrived in Paris after a two hour train journey from Ebbsfleet International Railroad Station in Kent, England. Our friends, Alan and Elaine, had kindly risen early with us in order to take us to the station and we bade farewell to them for the next few days as we excitedly prepared to board the Eurostar. 

From the moment we emerged from the Chunnel, we were greeted with blue skies and sunshine and, after we had checked into our hotel, we set off for a walking tour of some of the major sights here, in this beautiful city. Mark has been to Paris twice before; but for me, this was going to be a first!

Although it says the walk is just over 3 hours, we took just under 7, counting all the stops. 

The first stop was the stunning Basilica of the Sacred Heart (La Basilique due Sacre Coeur). Set up high on a hill overlooking a good part of the city, it was only about a 20 minute walk, and we sat on a bench to eat the picnic we had bought on the way up. The Sacre Coeur is one of the most well-known buildings in France, and it certainly lives up to its reputation for beauty. 

Love the blossoms in this picture

Although I had seen it many times in photographs, I was not prepared for the wow factor when seeing it for the first time in reality. 

The Main Altar

Model of the Basilica

We spent some time exploring inside the church before venturing out into the sunshine once more to resume our walking tour. 

Next stop - Monmartre - where artists display their works and tourists flock to enjoy the outdoor cafes and the plethora of artistic gems. There was such a wonderful feeling of freedom and a sense of being totally laid back, which was infectious. 

We had to take a shot of the steps of Montmartre - the same ones that were showcased in the movie, 'Midnight in Paris'. 

The Steps of Montmartre

One of the things I noticed - and loved - was how they had preserved the cobbled streets on many of the back roads. 

Cobbled Streets added to the ambience of the city

Wherever you go, there are places to eat/drink outdoors

After enjoying the ambience of Montmartre, we made our way to Boulevard de Clichy to see the famous, Moulin Rouge. Smaller than I had imagined, it still held the sway of eliciting a thrill of being so close to another famous landmark, and the birthplace of the modern version of the can-can dance. 

On the way to the Moulin Rouge, we saw a public toilet. Now, why would we include this in our blog about such a beautiful city? Well, we were very impressed with this little construction because, after each use, the door closed and the whole interior was thoroughly showered and disinfected! You just had to remember to wait until AFTER the cycle had been completed before entering!!

The toilets were mechanically cleaned and disinfected after each use.

From here, we proceeded south towards the Palais Garnier, more popularly known as the Paris Opera House - and the setting for the novel, stage show, and movie of 'The Phantom of the Opera'. (Part of me wanted to go inside to see if the 'chandelier' was still there!) This is such a splendid piece of architecture, with gilded figures (atop) at either end, giving it a sense of symmetry. 

Carefully crossing the various streets (with eyes peeling in every direction!!!), we took a quick walk through the Tuileries gardens on our way to the Place de la Concorde. 

From there, we could see down the Avenue de Champs Elysees to the Arc de Triomphe, which was our next destination. 

We were surprised to see 'Marks and Sparks' - a solid British institution - on the Champs Elysees! 

A busy street

After seeing the Arc de Triomphe, in person, I am going to have to stop teasing Mark by calling it the 'Marble Arch'! (He has an Athena Block of the Arc de Triomphe at home, and I can always be sure of evoking a certain 'look' from him when I call it by its lesser cousin). In reality, there is no comparison as the Arc de Triomphe stands tall and proud in the centre of 12 radiating avenues, and is much more magnificent. 

We met two lovely people from Texas, with whom we shared photographic moments. Couldn't believe that Rose (on the right) was the mother of Anjellyca (on the left)! We have become Facebook friends, so hope that they get to see that they are mentioned in this blog!

Our new Facebook friends from Texas, U.S.A. 

Of course, the one monument I had longed to see was the most famous of them all - the Eiffel Tower - and it certainly did not thwart my expectations! 

I finally got to dust of one of my ambitions - to take a photo from underneath, looking upwards. 

We are looking forward to ascending the tower on our last morning, before we leave for our return rail trip to the U.K. 

The blossoms surrounding the area made us think of the song, 'April in Paris' - and the warmth of the sun on faces attested to the time of year in which we found ourselves in this wonderful place. 

Beautiful blossoms added to the ambience

Spending some time just taking in the moment, we continued our walkabout by taking steps down to the pathway following alongside the Seine, passing a variety of sights - buildings, bridges, and boats in particular. 

The Musee d'Orsay

Pont Alexandre III - very impressive bridge! (The first stone was laid by Tsar Nicholas II).

By this time, about 5 hours had passed and we still had to make it to our final destination before returning to the hotel - the legendary Cathedral of Notre Dame on the Ile de la Cite. 

Craning our necks at each turn of the river, the top of the towers eventually came into view. We were delighted to see it completely bathed in sunlight and could not have wished for a more wonderful introduction!

I've always wanted to see those famous buttresses

The carvings on the main entrance doorway are incredible

The sheer detail of the stonework - wherever one looks - is truly breath-taking; and it left us wondering about the dedication of the builders and various sculptors, most of whom did not live to see the fruits of their labours in the completion of the edifice. 

The interior was just as splendid and we were allowed to visit in silence while a Mass was being celebrated. 

The Nave

The largest Rose Window in Europe

Side Chapel

Back outside in the sunshine, we made our way around the Cathedral and noticed a corner cafe called, 'The Esmeralda Cafe'. I half-wondered if we would see Charles Laughton swing down to pay a visit to Maureen O'Hara!!

Cafe Esmeralda

After 7 hours on our feet, we were happy to catch the Metro back to the hotel. 

However, after a couple of hours rest, we decided to go out again and took another walking tour to see the City of Light in all its glory. (These pics are not in any particular order). 

Ferris Wheel at Place de la Concorde

Musee d'Orsay

Notre Dame - all lit up!

The famous pyramid entrance to the Louvre

The pyramid up close

The Eiffel Tower at night

Walking along the Seine

We certainly slept well on that first night!!

Light display, every hour, on the hour!